My New Blog

Well, here is my brand-new blog! I say brand new blog because I actually already have a lovely blog which I would like to use but I can't. See, not only have I forgotten the password, but I don't even know which of my e-mail accounts I used to set it up. I checked each e-mail address along with every password I remembered that I had EVER used for any site and nothing. So, goodbye old blog. It's been fun.

(if you want to check it out, it's http://will-i-am-tech.blogspot.com/)

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So! New blog. Hmm... I'm not sure what to talk about. Maybe I'll tell you a story or two. Yes! That I will do.

I shall call this first story, "It Pays To Be Drunk". :)

Oh, and it's kind of long. I tend to get long-winded with boring stories. Ah well.

Okay, so I work at the Browning Center on Weber State Campus as a 'stage technician'. On Saturday night, I was stage managing the an orchestra show in the Austad Auditorium. I showed up at 5:30 because I wanted to have some time to set up a few things so that I would be completely set up by the time the orchestra arrived. 5 minutes later, I was done. So I sat at the stage manager's console trying to look important while reading a book I had brought with me. 6:00 rolls by and no one from the orchestra is here. The show is set to start at 7:30 with house opening at 7:00.
"Hmm, that's odd...", I thought to myself, "Usually there would be someone here by now."
I then remembered Dylan, a co-worker, telling me that this certain orchestra usually arrives early enough to get set up in time, but late enough to scare the stage manager into thinking that they were going to be late for their performance. Ah, well. No biggie. They will show up. I'll just chill at this desk and read my book. (I was actually expecting the orchestra's manager to show up right around now to get the stage set with the chairs and stands needed for their performance. He hadn't come yet.)

6:30 rolls around and finally we have an orchestra member! Hooray. We have 1 of a roughly 70 member orchestra. Great. Shouldn't the manager be here by now?

6:45 comes and still no manager. We have almost all the members here and they have started to set some of their chairs and stands. But they aren't quite sure how the stage looks, so they just place chairs where they thought they should go and hoped for the best.

6:55. House is supposed to open in 5 minutes. Still no manager. Now I'm getting kind of nervous. I was supposed to let the house staff know the house policies for this show about a half an hour ago, but I couldn't yet because I didn't know what the policies were. And the stage still wasn't set right.

Finally, the manager walks in. And with him comes the overwhelming pungent odor of grain alcohol. (I wondered why he was late. Now I think I know.) He was still walking as well as a 65 year old geriatric could walk drunk, but somehow he was able to get the stage set by 7:15... We had to delay opening the house for 15 minutes, which completely inconvenienced everyone. Especially the house staff. But hey! At least the manager was all smiles, right? (He actually was pretty cheerful.)

Well, the show started at 7:35, which is not an uncommon starting time, that's for sure. And the show went really smoothly. I would get periodic updates about the show and the challenge of the music from the much inebriated manager. He would talk about the house count and say things like "Last time we were here they had to open up the balcony for us. Isn't that something?" or"That was the hardest part of the whole show. And they nailed it." "You gentlemen do such fine job every year. I just love coming here."

Well, after about an hour and a half, the show finally ended. Hallejulah! (The music itself wasn't too bad, but having that old drunk talk to your face with his old man/alcohol breath about stuff you could really care less about for that long... I was done."

One by one, the orchestra makes it's way out the door until all who were left was me, Bart (who recorded the show), the manager and his wife. As he was making his way out the door he kept saying, "Thank you guys so much. You know, you guys always do such a great job. We love coming here. You know, you guys are so much better than the so-called "professionals" we work with on occasion. You guys treat me like a king. I get here and it's all set up for me. (Granted, he should really be the one who sets it up, but whatever. Show's done.) We love to come here. Thanks. You guys are great. We just lo--" (I swear, he must have repeated himself about 5 times in that short conversation.)

Well, he is just about out the door when he turns around. (Oh no! He's going to talk again!) And then he said, "I bet you guys could use 20 bucks." We said, "No, we're alright. Don't worry about." He repeated, "I bet you guys could use 20 bucks. Here. Here's 20 bucks for each of you." Before we could stop him, we each had 20 bucks in our hands.

"I love coming here. You guys treat me like a king when I get here. Have a good night guys!"

"See ya! Drive safe", we said back to him.

And when the door shut behind him, me and Bart just looked at each other and laughed. And that is how 'It Pays (other people) To Be Drunk."

NOTE: I do not endorse, nor have I ever endorsed, drinking in any way, shape or form. But 20 bucks? Can't argue with results, right? :)

And that is the end to my long, boring, and anti-climactic story. If you read the whole thing, congratulations! You must be very bored! If you just skipped to the end, I don't blame you...

Well, more stories to come later! Have a great night everyone.